Half way There little boy

I can't believe that this pregnancy is already halfway over. Up until this point I was wanting the days and weeks to fly by. I wanted to get to this point. I wanted people to ask when I was due. I wanted to wake up and not feel like vomiting. I wanted my shirts to get shorter and that belly bigger. And guess what? I'm here.

And now I don't want to be. I don't want to know that I only have 20ish weeks left to feel this baby's sweet kicks, to soak up these dances and jabs. I'm getting to my favorite stage of pregnancy, the not too big, not small...the just right stage.

The good news is, I have been off of my zofran for 3 weeks now! I refused to say anything, because any time I did, I was plagued. I have only had a couple days where things didn't quite stay down....but I no longer feel the 24/7 nausea that I had up until this point. I did however come down with a cold. A cold....a stupid little cold....that pretty much made me feel like I had been hit by a bus. 

And judging from how both boys have been acting this past week and a half.....I hope it was the cold speaking....otherwise, I am in for it.

I'm realizing how much I need the extra time with this sweet boy in my belly. My other two are not ready for him yet. This week. This week has been hard. Cole has proven over and over that the two's were not his most trying times...but the three's...almost 4's? Yeah, I'm feeling it. I'm finding myself at my wits end over and over and over again. And Bennett seems to be graduating into two-hood by being the ever so stereotypical toddler you here about, only he bumps it up a notch in true Bennett fashion. He can put on a screaming fit, raise the octaves by ten and carry on for a good 40 minutes.....easy. And over and over again.

Then I realize that I'm going to be juggling a third amongst these raging emotions, and I wonder how I will ever get a longer than my already-way-too-short fuse.

I'm a bit scared. Ok, ALOT scared.

But a lot more excited. I'm going to choose the excitement and joy over the worrisome and fear that sometimes grips my heart.

Because, halfway there. That's big. That's exciting, that's something to be thankful for.
 

I've also determined that this will be the last time I squeeze myself and my belly into that shirt. Just trying to get some last wear in some clothes before I fold them up and don't attempt to look at them for the next 6 months or so.

How far along: 20 weeks!!!

Total weight gain: No idea, I don't weigh myself in between appts.

Maternity clothes: About the same as before, jeans yes....tops mostly no. And still wearing out my maxi skirts and dresses while I have the chance.

Sleep: The past week has not been good. I toss and turn a lot, and then when I got sick i spent more time being awake than actual sleeping. Last night, I slept great! So I'm going to enjoy that for the day.

Best moment this week: This actually happened a little over a week ago, but we will go ahead and count it. After laying down in bed, Kyle reach over and laid his hand on my belly. At that exact moment baby boy gave one good solid kick! After many previous attempts, the little stinker would notoriously stop kicking the moment Kyle tried to feel him. So it was a pretty exciting moment for the both of us!

Food cravings: Still on an apple kick, love them....could eat them all day long. And carrots, raw, crunchy carrots. Lime popsicles (the only ones I can handle, the others are too sweet). Speaking of sweet, I'm still way into peanut butter M&M's but chose some dark chocolate peanut ones over the peanut butte this week.( and secretly I gave myself a pat on the back for choosing the healthier choice...in my preggo mind a peanut is less processed, therefore...healthier. And the dark chocolate...well, has antioxidants...healthy. I denied myself from thinking about the candy coating, and felt pretty good about my decision). I also, had my first craving of candy. while at Winco with Kyle and the boys, I got distracted while they were getting raisins. I proudly came around the corner with two bags of 1) cherry and blue raspberry sour patch candies and 2) candy corn. I may have gotten a "that's really disgusting" from the hubby. Well, that's fine...more for me! I had my first craving for coffee one morning, and promptly made myself a homemade mocha....and then sadly, never had the craving again. I'm back to my homemade chair tea lattes. And lastly, pumpkin. Pumpkin anything and everything...I want it ALL!

Food Aversions: Still can't think about sweet potatoes, beets, eggplant, and garlic. I have been using dried garlic, because the thought of mincing fresh garlic really makes me feel urpy.And desserts still don't ever sound appealing....I even turned down a frozen yogurt run tonight, so weird....so not me.

Have you started to show:

Yep.

Labor signs: The braxton hicks having been hitting hard this week. One night I was awake from 1-5 in the morning and was getting BH about every 15 minutes. They are also getting to the strength where they completely distort my belly.

Happy or moody: Oh man, I'm gonna have to go with super-extraordinarily moody. I think it was a combo of being sick, no sleep, naughty boys, tantrum ridden boys, and have I mentioned the extreme exhaustion???? Yeah, not a good combo.

How are you feeling: Actually despite being sick, I'm going to say good...because, well, when you aren't nauseous 24/7 and throwing up....anything feels better! And I am so so happy to not be on any more meds.

I have fallen completely head over heels with this little boy. I can tell already he is going to be active, strong, and want to keep up with both his brothers. While I am super anxious to meet his face, I don't want to rush it, and I don't want to wish away a moment with him in my tummy. It is such a special time I get to share with him. And I plan on enjoying every second to the best of my ability.

Also, I have been working on a 2 year post for Bennett boy...and with all the attitudes and tantrums it has been real hard to find the motivation to finish it. So hopefully I will have it finished before he turns 3. ;) I thought this post would be easier since the boy in my belly hasn't learned the art of disrespect yet.....