Bow ties and tears

I know I had promised to have a post up almost immediately after the reveal. However, life happens. And we have been reeling with the news of a little girl gone to heaven way too soon. This sweet girl happened to be my niece's best friend. When something tragic like this happens, you can't help but ask why, you can't help but put yourself in the shoes of the parents who are living their nightmare. Makes me thankful we have a Heavenly Father who knows, who cares, who is there to carry the brokenhearted through the darkest of storms. I don't know what we would do without Him.

So yes, I will try to do a light hearted post with all the details of the reveal, but know that the day is intertwined with bitter-sweetness. It's a day i want to forever have engraved in my mind, because it was the day we fell deeper and deeper in love with our baby, but it is also a day that we were reminded of the fragility of life. We don't know how long we have on this earth, our days are numbered, and so are our children's. That's a tough truth, one that I think we know in the back of our minds, but try not to let it surface.... because it's a painful truth. It's also a beautiful one. If you know Jesus, you have hope beyond this world. And you have a Jesus who has walked through such darkness, such pain, sorrow and loss. He knows what it feels to have your heart shattered into teeny tiny pieces. He knows the salty tears, the unforgiving pain. And He cares. And He will carry you, when you don't think you can lift your head on your own. And might I even add, He will help you find joy again. I know, because I have seen it in friend's lives who have lost more than anyone can imagine, yet they walk with joy, because they have Jesus. Sweet, sweet truth.

So here I go, even though I feel a bit selfish to post such crazy excitement, such joyous laughter, and such beautiful moments. I want to, because maybe it will help this cloud that seems to have fallen over my heart. I want to celebrate this life, the one I have growing stronger and stronger in my belly.

Because it deserves it. Or should I say, "HE" deserves it.

And it brings me joy that I got to decorate one of the last "girly-ish" party that I will ever get to do. My theme was "Bow Ties or Tu-tus". I didn't go all out, just kept it simple with cupcakes adorned with either a tu-tu or bow tie. My dear friend made these for me, and bless her heart, the week she was to deliver them, she found herself in the hospital. But it didn't stop her from getting the toppers and the adorable ruffled garland to me in time for the reveal. Jill, you are amazing! Please check out her shop Ruffles n Such (link here). She is so much fun and so easy to work with!

And then here are the adorable tu-tus. She custom created them just for me! I may have cried when I first saw a mock up done of them.

The cupcakes were kind of my creation, and get this, no tears were shed while making them! If you are looking for a white cake recipe, this is it. I will share the full recipe in a following post. Because they are not only dreamy, but also easy...and there are endless possibilities with fillings and frostings!

We asked everyone to pick a cupcake with a topper of their guess. And we also kept track of guesses from all who chimed in on Facebook. As you can see, GIRL was by far, the winning vote.

Oh, and did I mention that we didn't know at this point what we were having either. The night before, Kyle suggested that we wait and find out along with the rest of our family! And honestly, I didn't think it would be possible. See, we have been trained to spot the "goods" rather quickly with both our other boys. So when we left the ultrasound appointment, we both looked at each other and asked if the other had seen "anything". Nope. Nothing. Which left me more confused, and I started thinking that we might actually have a little girl. Kyle started sweating bullets (no, really....he did) and was getting worried that he wouldn't know what to do with a girl.

Honestly, it was perfect. I liked that we left completely clueless since we bot went into the appointment so sure that we would see all boy pop up all over the screen. Made the reveal so much more exciting for us!

My little sister, again came to my rescue and whipped up two amazingly gorgeous tu-tus.  The plan was after everyone grabbed their cupcake, we would take the boys outside, open the card, and then we would all come in wearing either bow ties or tu-tus.

There were a lot of tu-tus and people sporting pink. Then came time for the reveal.

AAAAANNNNNDDDD........

The hardest part was after we opened the card and announced to the boys that they would have another brother. Cole's lip went way out, and in the saddest little voice goes, "but I really wanted a girl......"

As you can see, he still wasn't completely over it when we walked in to reveal to the family.

But he warmed up to the idea, and now thinks it's pretty cool!

And Bennett was fine with whatever, just as long as we didn't take his cupcake from him. Poor kid missed his nap that day, so I wasn't about to stir up anything....and may have let him eat the whole thing in place of dinner.

I, on the other had tears. I couldn't believe it...yet I could. When my mom asked if my tears were happy or sad...I quickly replied, "happy, so so happy!".

Kyle wiped the sweat from his brow and exhaled the moment he learned we would have another boy...secretly, that is what he was hoping for. (And he may have said, "major shopping spree diverted....")Me, I wasn't sold on either way. Honestly, I could see either being the perfect fit, but now that I know it's a boy....it just seems like the missing piece to our puzzle is now complete. I could not be any happier. I love, love, love having boys. And now I don't have to figure out how to do fancy braids or curls and buns. ;)

3 boys. Feels like a loud, very fun dream. And I can guarantee this is about the only use we will have for tu-tus in our future.....

And Kyle is gonna kill me for this last one.....

I may have let him dance around a bit...and took a lot more pictures....just to bug his daddy. 

But seriously, our hearts are full. And this little boy growing in me is starting to give me some good jabs, oh how I can't wait to meet his little face, and kiss his cheeks, and hold the hands that will be giving me some upper cuts to the ribs soon.

Soon, sweet baby boy..... I will make sure to have a brand new bow tie awaiting your arrival....just for you. We love everything about you, you complete this family.