But when you have had a week like we have, you tend to get a little paranoid. Especially when your oldest starts having a fever that keeps creeping up just like brothers did.
I even made Cole a bed next to ours one night just because I had this awful fear that his fever would sky rocket and he would start seizing while I was sleeping. I didn't get much sleep the following days after Bennett's nightmare. Cole had reverted back to his newborn sleeping ways....up every fifteen minutes, either yelling for me or Kyle. He wanted out of his crib, he wanted to go downstairs and watch Mickey Mouse, he wanted to sleep on the floor, he wanted milk....he slept maybe, maybe a wink one night. Kyle finally gave in and set up camp for him on a mattress on his floor, and I was greeted with a "hi mama" as I opened my door to go get a hungry Bennett at 3 AM.
And a rough morning when I woke up to a Cole with a 102 fever and red dots all over his face. I promptly took him to the doctor and threatened to just bring a tent and camp out in their lobby until everyone was healthy and done scaring me.
Turns out my sweet punkin has a double ear infection and we are waiting on the results of a strep culture.
Hopefully his antibiotics will have him back to his tractor-driving days in no time.
Bennett on the other hand is feeling better but has been diagnosed with "failure to thrive" do to his decreasing weight. He has been put on a strict all fat, as much fat as possible diet. we go back in a month to see if he improves, and if not then they will be doing a full work up to see if there are underlying issues.
So here is my plan of action, chocolate.....lots and lots of chocolate. It helps me cope, it helps me breathe, it helps me feel like just for a moment everything is just fine. And then I soak up little moments when my binky-mouthed baby looks up at me and smiles and his binky pops out.. The brief moments when my two year old wants me to lie down next to him and snuggle with him for two seconds. Or when Bennett crawls over next to Cole, plops down...Cole wraps his arms around him and says, "Twwwwoooo Boooooyyyyss" and then looks at me and says "picture mama". Seriously. Love them. These are the things my heart lives for.
Hopefully within this next month we can get my wee Bennett to chunk up so that he can get a check of approval from his doctor. But until then I am going to keep at my chocolate therapy...and this, this amazing chocolate sauce couldn't have been introduced to me at a better time. My sister-in-law told me about it and said she was addicted. Yeah, thanks....me too.
It's life changing. It really is. It makes the most amazing ice cream topping and even better creamy, dreamy homemade mochas. I had originally made it for Bennett's ice cream bar for his birthday.....but since his party got delayed, I dug in....and kept digging...and now I am going to have to make some more to replenish the almost empty jar. Oops!
So if you need yourself a chocolate fix, and don't want to have to deal with preservatives and chemicals additives, and want just a moment to forget about what may be falling down around you, then whip up a batch of this.
Heavenly Homemade Chocolate Sauce
(Source: 52 Kitchen Adventures)
- 1 1/4 cup organic sugar
- 1 cup unsweetened cocoa powder
- 1 cup water
- 1/4 teaspoon salt
- 2 teaspoon vanilla extract
- In a medium saucepan, whisk together sugar and cocoa powder until most of the lumps are gone.
- Add water and salt and cook over medium heat, stirring frequently.
- Bring to a boil and cook for a few minutes, until thickened, continuing to stir frequently.
- Remove from heat and let cool for 5 minutes, then add vanilla extract.
- Store in an air tight container in the fridge and enjoy within 2-4 weeks.